Album: Crack Smoking Shirts

Description: This “Quiet Piggy” design delivers big, chaotic energy with a smug little hog who looks like he’s ready to squeal on everyone at the county fair. With its bold linework, retro-ink shading, and unmistakable attitude, this shirt is perfect for anyone who loves political humor, barnyard chaos, or just really funny animal designs. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. It’s weird. It’s bold. It oinks with confidence. Wear it to stir the pot or just to make strangers double-take.

Description: Big bold letters. Zero subtlety. This brings back gas station bathroom graffiti energy with a shot of hillbilly shock Political humor. “Guess Who’s Blowing Bubba?” is straight from a trailer park fever dream—equal parts offensive and oddly Presidential. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. Great for those who like their comedy inappropriate, and their conversations instantly awkward. Take it to family reunions, parole hearings, voting booth, street protest, or anywhere someone might be named Bubba and looking to throw hands.

Description: A bulldog with a suspiciously familiar combover and scowl, this bold design is a visual punchline with bite. “The Dog That Hasn’t Barked” is more than a meme—it’s a statement. Whether you’re calling out silence in high places or just vibing with chaotic political energy, this shirt lets you bark without saying a word. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. Perfect for protestors, watchdogs, and anyone who prefers their satire with teeth and fur. Ideal gift for political junkies, meme lovers, and agents of chaos.

Description: Sink your teeth into satire with this Gruesome Newsome vampire design! Featuring a bloodthirsty caricature of California’s own Gavin Newsom reimagined as a classic horror villain, this is perfect for political dissidents, freedom fiends, or anyone who thinks things are getting a little too... fangy in the Golden State. Sharp, bold, and sure to stir the pot—whether you’re storming the statehouse or just the snack table.

Description: Heavy lies the crown—but not for this guy. Our “I’m Not a King” design features a bold, satirical portrait of Donald Trump rocking a royal crown and bright red lipstick, paired with the defiant phrase, “I’M NOT A KING.” Whether you’re making a political statement or just love some chaotic comedy, this hits hard. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. Perfect for protestors, meme lords, political junkies, and anyone who believes democracy shouldn’t come with a monarchy side quest. It’s edgy, bold, and just absurd enough to get side-eyes and smirks in every room you walk into.

Description: This bold orange jack-o’-lantern is here to party! “Let’s Get Smashed” isn’t just a Halloween pun—it’s a full-on pumpkin-powered declaration. Perfect for spooky season ragers, bar crawls, costume parties, or just carving out some chaos. Whether you’re dressed up, blacked out, or pumpkin-spiced into oblivion—this is your seasonal spirit animal. Rock it drunk, rock it sober, just don’t forget the candy (or the whiskey).

Description: Welcome to your worst craving. This disturbing and delicious design features a nightmare-inducing clown gleefully gripping a massive burger… stuffed with terrified human faces. It’s part social commentary, part slasher flick, and 100% eye-catching. Whether you’re anti-corporate, horror-obsessed, or just have a twisted sense of humor, this one’s cooked medium-rare with a side of psychological fries. Use it to freak out your local drive-thru, punk your vegan friends, or start a conversation about the meat industry that no one will forget. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts.

Description: Two little devils, one hell of a workout. This twisted fitness parody features a pair of grinning demons hitting the treadmills like it’s leg day in the underworld. Equal parts motivational and unholy, Exercise Your Demons is the perfect shirt for gym rats, goths, and anyone whose therapy plan includes cardio and chaos. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo For Crack Smoking Shirts. Sweat out your sins, summon some endorphins, and maybe scare a few people at Planet Fitness while you’re at it. 💀 Great For: Gym freaks with dark humor Metalheads who lift Demonic personal trainers Occult fitness enthusiasts Anyone exorcising (or exercising) something

Description: Lick it and blast off. This retro-style graphic tfeatures a wide-eyed kid gleefully holding a toad—tongue out and ready for takeoff—beneath bold "5-MEO-DMT" text with a warped rainbow trail. Inspired by old-school comics and underground trip culture, this shirt is a wink and a nod to the psychonauts who know what's really going down in the desert. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. Perfect for festival weirdos, spiritual rebels, or anyone who’s ever questioned reality and wanted to high-five a cosmic frog.

Description: Sinister, sassy, and impossible to ignore—this devilish design puts a fiery twist on classic propaganda posters. Featuring a grinning demon with slicked-back hair and horns to match, he's pointing straight at you... with one hell of a message. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. Whether you're into dark humor, gothic vibes, or just want to trigger your coworkers, this is a scorched-earth conversation starter.

Description: He’s not making science fair volcanoes — he’s cooking up problems. Meet the Drug Designer, a wild-eyed retro lab kid whipping up who-knows-what in a cartoon chemistry lab straight out of a pharmaceutical fever dream. With beakers bubbling, powders piling, and a grin that screams “unlicensed genius,” this design blends vintage comic style with a dash of forbidden knowledge. Perfect for science rebels, chemistry majors with a dark side, or anyone who’s ever read a Vice article at 3am and thought, “Yeah, I could probably synth that.” Whether you’re into dark humor, ironic education tees, or just want people to back up a few steps when they see you, this delivers. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo For Crack Smoking Shirts.

Description: Not that kind of swinger… or maybe exactly that. This unnervingly cute design features a wide-eyed retro cartoon girl mid-swing, with an oversized grin that says she knows something you don’t. Is it innocent playground fun or a coded invitation to chaos? We’ll let the smirk do the talking. The Swinger design rides the line between adorable and alarming, nostalgic and deranged — perfect for lovers of weird humor, retro horror-core, or shirts that make people double-take in public. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. Great For: Cult movie lovers Dark humor collectors Vintage-core weirdos Playground outlaws People who thrive on the awkward silence after the punchline

Description: Straight from the twisted kitchen of your nightmares comes this “Quality Dutch Ovens” — where innocence meets gas-powered chaos. Featuring a wide-eyed retro girl, a cursed-looking Dutch oven, flaming forest smoke, and an unsettling sun with a smile that knows too much. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. It’s equal parts vintage cookbook and cult horror flyer. Perfect for fans of dark humor, offbeat horrorcore, ironic culinary designs, and that WTF did I just see? energy. Watch people either laugh, squint, or slowly walk away.

Description: Bold. Armed. Questionably named. This Dirty Sanchez features a vintage-style Mexican revolutionary bandit locked and loaded with crossed arms, bullet belts, and the kind of stare that says, “You don’t wanna ask.” Whether you have it for laughs, edge, or legend, this delivers classic outlaw vibes with a smirk. Vintage western grit, bold inked lines, and enough attitude to make even your grandma squint and say “...what?” Perfect for troublemakers, meme lords, and everyone walking that thin line between hilarious and offensive. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts.

Description: Two in the pink, one in the—well, you know the rest. 😏 This The Shocker design brings back the legendary hand gesture with bold retro style and a thick layer of unapologetic attitude. Clean lines, vintage tones, and a wink of bad taste make this one an instant favorite for those who thrive on side-eyes and uncomfortable laughs. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. Whether you're making people laugh, cringe, or both at once, this design does the heavy lifting so you don't have to say a word. It's not subtle. It’s not classy. It’s just... shocking. Great For: Fans of dirty jokes and classic innuendo People with no filter and proud of it Wild nights, bar crawls, and bachelor parties

Description: Welcome to the Rusty Trombone Truck Stop & Diner — where the coffee’s strong, the humor’s questionable, and the service comes with a side of innuendo. This bold retro-style design features a brass trombone and the tagline: “Stuff your face while you pump!” Subtle? Absolutely not. Hilarious? Always. Perfect for lovers of crude jokes, dirty diner humor, brass band puns, and anyone who knows exactly what this means (and still wears it in public anyway). Serve up chaos at truck stops, band practice, or your next awkward family reunion. Great for: Music nerds with a dark side Fans of edgy vintage diner aesthetics Adult humor connoisseurs Road dogs, weirdos, and unapologetic pun-lovers

Description: This bold typographic design delivers the message loud and clear: “Relax Gringo, I’m Legal.” Whether you're making a statement, shutting down assumptions, or just wearing your attitude with a wink, this gets the job done with retro lettering and undeniable swagger. Designed by Cosmo Gazoo for Crack Smoking Shirts. Perfect for those who love humor with bite, cultural commentary, or just want to drop jaws without saying a word.

Description: Escape Debt Fake Your Death designed by Cosmo Gazoo. This hilariously dark design serves up some cheeky financial advice with a possum twist. Front and center is a wide-eyed, scruffy possum in its signature “playing dead” pose, paired with bold, retro-style text that reads "ESCAPE DEBT" and the punchline "FAKE YOUR DEATH" underneath. The contrast between the adorably scrappy critter and the tongue-in-cheek message creates a perfect storm of humor and satire. Ideal for those who appreciate a little absurdity in their wardrobe, this shirt is a fun way to make light of life’s financial woes. Whether you’re rocking it at casual hangouts or just embracing your love for offbeat humor, this design is sure to turn heads and spark

Description: Relax Gringo I'm Legal.

Description: Persident Joe Biden says Corn Pop was a bad dude during a speech.

Description: Allegedly Ostrich flightless bird synth-wave inspired design.

Description: Joe Biden Gaff. Go to Joe 30330. That is not a place, nor is it a full website name. Viewers were left guessing what the former vice president meant.

Description: Assumption Is The Mother Of All. The creator of what you should stay away from.

Description: I'm Currently Unsupervised. This should frighten you.

Description: Ridin' Spinners. It's time for you to start flexing your ride.

Description: Number Juan. He's at the top.

Description: Man Whore. Hes no good for you but if hes good at what he does, youll fall in love with him,

Description: Drugs Responsible For Teaching America The Metric System. It was the easiest way to learn.

Description: Condoms Are For Dicks. It's really the only thing they fit on.

Description: It's A Celebration. That's the event.

Description: Stop Staring At My Jugs. Keep looking at eye level there sport.

Description: Toss My Salad I'm A Vegetarian.

Description: No Cerveza No Trabajo. Without beer there will be no work.

Description: Dirty Sanchez. Don't become a victim.

Description: Hungry Hungry Games. The hippo is just plain hungry.

Description: China Owns You. Uncle Sam has sold out to another power.